WTF?

Omg. So I'm on oovoo doing video conference with my ADAM. So, his friend, a girl he used to hook up with, gets on a video conference with us. afterwards he makes a comment inviting her over to his house and this is all after our amazing weekend together. lik,e i don;t even understand why he just can't do one thing..

please. just tell me how you feel once and for all so that i can move over or move on. this shit kills me. literally tears me apart everyday. i can't stand it.

Scary-Accurate Horoscope!!!

"You're hitting it off splendidly. It's going so well, in fact, you're thinking of asking your new flame to do an instant replay of tonight -- tomorrow night. Oh, go ahead. At this point, they've sent you enough positive signals to let you know it's not your imagination. You're really connecting. What do you have to lose? And, more importantly, what do you both have to gain?"

Damn. I am a Virgo through and through. This horoscope reads like it was at the party with us. 

What do I have to offer?

Saw my sweetie again :D I'm not exactly all smiles though. Lots of drama ensued. First of all, I was COMPLETELY drunk. I mean totally. But to my advantage, I'm a happy-go-lucky drunk, so no damage was done there. But here's what happened:

I came into the house and immediately made a bee-line for him. We hugged for a minute and then I greeted everyone else. Minutes later, and for the rest of the night, we were all over each other. Not sexually. Just openly holding hands, rubbing each others' back or chest, exchanging cute looks. All the things we never do in front of other people. He was totally open and receptive, even though we were surrounded by our closest friends.
Later, quietly excused myself so that I could puke in private, then I went to lie down in his bed. He came in every half hour for 4 hours just to check on me. It was awesome. Such a CLEAR display of his affection for me.

However, I just can't believe it. On the ride home, his cousin yelled that I was blind if I couldn't see how he feels about me. I told her that I need to hear him say it.

When we were young, our parents taught us that actions speak louder than words. That may be true in most cases, but A.D.A.M. is different. Every action is positive, every word is negative. He shows me all day that he loves me, but all he ever tells me is that we should be friends. Deep inside I feel that he honestly does love me. I know he does. But as his bestie, I also know that he has a lot on his mind and his plate to work off before we can be together.

How far is too far?

I started this blog because I need a place to vent my frustration. I'm in love with a close friend, but I can't figure him out. Every ACTION is SUPER-positive. He pulls chairs and closes doors, but that's the gentleman his momma taught him to be. He routinely makes an extra effort for me and all of his friends and family think we're the perfect match. Here's the rub: All of his WORDS are negative. He constantly tells me that he wants to be my FRIEND.

I know what you're saying, 'girl, he's not into you!' And normally, I would agree. The situation is a little more complicated than that. I won't get into details, but I will tell you what I love about him.

1.) I can FEEL our connection, physically, every time I touch him. We could be holding hands or just handing over an item, but whenever our skin touches, it's like magic! 

2.) He makes me be a better person. Whenever I'm near him, I want to be my best self all the time. I feel like I can do anything, accomplish any task.


3.) He's my personal cheerleader. I can just see him standing there, megaphone in hand, telling me that I can do it, no matter what it is. He's never negative or abrasive with me. 


4.) Nothing is ever off limits. We can openly and honestly share anything with each other without the fear of being judged. 

5.) He's the same type of person as me. We have very similar goals, expectations, values, morals, and character. Our differences complement each other and we deal with confrontation in a similar matter. To me all of this = a great relationship in the making.


Right now, he's trying to decide if he should reconcile with his ex. Right now, I'm trying to decide if I should wait for him to make that decision.